Resolutions and Goals

At this time of year, nearly every magazine, paper, and blog has something about New Year's Resolutions and over the years, I've probably read hundreds of articles about how to set goals and resolutions and actually achieve them. Sometimes the information was helpful and sometimes it wasn't. Like singing and dieting, there is a lot of information out there, but each of us as individuals must experiment and find what works for our own circumstances. Over the past few years, I've learned a lot about what works for me. If anything here works for you, feel free to steal it. Also feel free to totally ignore what doesn't work.

First, your goal or resolution must be something that you really want to do or achieve, not something you "should" do. If you don't have a real desire for it, it will be come one of those resolutions that you forget about by the end of January.

Second, your goal or resolution should be realistic. If you use words like "every" and "never", you are setting yourself up for failure. Yes, it's good to work toward that, but if you decide to exercise every day and then miss one day in February, you've blown the resolution for the whole year.

Third, when writing goals or resolutions, you need to take into consideration things that are beyond your control. You may seriously want the lead in the musical, and have the talent to get it, but you are not in charge of casting. The director may have a different look or sound in mind. A much better goal would be to work on your singing, dancing, and acting skills and give the best audition that you are capable of.

Fourth, goals and resolutions are more easily accomplished when broken down into baby steps. Make a list of things that you need to do in order to accomplish your goal and then work on those one at a time. You are less likely to get overwhelmed or frustrated this way, and celebrating those little steps gives you the encouragement to keep going.

Fifth, post your list of resolutions or goals where you can see if every day. This helps keep you on target. In 2008, my resolutions were on the fridge door, and I've never had a more productive year (as far as resolutions go anyway).

Sixth, if at any point during the year you realize that a resolution needs to be adjusted, make the changes. Don't just keep working towards something you don't want or that is unrealistic considering your current life situation.

I didn't do so well on my 2009 resolutions, so here are some revised ones for 2010.

My 2010 Resolutions

I resolve to be more realistic about what I can accomplish.

Personal care and enrichment
1. Make writing a priority for each day. Journal, novels, stories, blogs, and voice book all count.
2. Read things that challenge me and help me grow intellectually and spiritually. Think about what I read. Highlight, take notes, and write in the margins.
3. Keep on top of laundry, ironing, de-cluttering, cleaning, or managing finances. It's OK to just do a little bit of a job. A little is better than nothing.
4. Do something every day that makes me feel good. This is one of those where I think I can make an exception to the "every" rule.
5. Continue to improve my eating habits.
6. Continue to improve my exercise habits. (Aim for 12 days at gym every month.)

Money
1. Make smarter choices about my money.
2. Eat out less.
3. Increase savings deposits and look into CDs or other investment/savings options.

Work
1. When accepting new students, think first about how much stress it will add, and then about how much I need the money.
2. No new students after 5PM.
3. Continue working to find ways to push students without pushing them over the edge.

Some people might look at this and think that I'm not pushing myself very hard. It's true. I spent too many years pushing too hard, and sometimes for things that I didn't even want. By setting goals and resolutions like this, I give myself a little room to breathe and a lot less stress. Because this is totally doable, I don't waste time and energy beating myself up for failures. I can actually do quite a bit with these kinds of goals by just reminding myself of them frequently.