Rethinking Faith

There is a bigger, broader post in the works about faith, but I needed to share a few things now.  Shaping the ideas into words and setting them in some semi-permanent form will help me to anchor them so that I can explore them in more depth when I add them to the big post.

The concept of faith fascinates me, but it frustrates me too.  Faith should play a big part in my life as a Mormon, but the truth is, I have serious faith issues because I have trust issues.  And because of the words and ideas that I've always associated with faith, I believed my own faith was either defective or nonexistent.  Then I decided to be brave, take some risks, and see where it lead me.

September has been a month of exploring faith (and it's not done yet!)  This week, I went to a writing session focused on faith, and as usually happens when I really open myself up to writing, I learned some really important things about faith and about myself.

I think that as much as we might like to have a one-size-fits-all answer for faith, that's not the way it works.  Faith manifests itself in different ways for different people or at different times.   As we wrote the other night, I connected to how faith works in my life.

Faith can be testing the ground to make sure that it is safe before moving on.  I thought about tai chi walking, a drill we do frequently to explore balance and weight-shift.  You must be firmly grounded, with all the weight transferred to one foot before the other leaves the ground.  Then the empty foot lifts and does what we call a clearing step, a small sweep to make sure nothing is in the way.  You set down the heel, then the toe.  The foot is flat on the ground, but no weight has been committed yet.  You could easily pick up the foot and move it back to where it started.  Then, when you know there is firm ground beneath you, supporting you, you shift the weight to that foot.  Even after you have shifted the weight, as long as both feet are still on the ground, you are free to shift the weight back, forward, or balance it between both feet.  Your waist and upper body naturally, easily turn in the direction of the weighted foot.  If you choose to move forward again, you simply place all weight in that foot and lift the other foot for the next step.

I used to think about faith as "95% of people can walk across this icy parking lot without falling, so you should be able to too." To be careful or cautious about the way I proceeded seemed to be a lack of faith.  It worked for everyone else, so it should work for me too.  Now I understand faith as moving forward.  Period.  And if I need to take my steps with the certainty that tai chi walking provides, that can still be faith.

I also learned that my belief in possibility is also my faith.  Being a Star Trek Mormon is a legitimate way of operating in faith.

I'm excited to see where this exploration takes me and what the final form of the big blog post becomes.  Faith is what is important to you, and what you set your heart upon.  And faith always includes an element of Love. And in the end, Love, whatever it is and however you get there, is all that matters.

What Being a Liberal Mormon Means to Me

Last week, a firestorm erupted when Meridian Magazine published an article by Joni Hilton titled, "Are You a Liberal Mormon?"  Meridian Magazine has taken down the article and published an apology, but you can still read it (and commentary from John Dehlin) here. When I first posted the original link and my response, I expected a lot of fallout from my friends.  What I got instead was agreement, support, and intelligent comments and questions.

One question that arose is how do we define liberal Mormon.  I've had to think about this a lot, for several reasons.  First, although I do lean to the liberal side of things politically, I didn't want this to be about politics.  My liberal views are not just political ideology, they are part of what makes me who I am.  I can't separate the Mormon me from the liberal me.  More about the liberal stuff later.

Second, as I acknowledged in a few conversations about this, labels can be problematic.  They do set us apart from something, and I was having trouble finding ways to articulate my views about being a liberal Mormon without comparing them to something else.  (You still might get a little of this).

Third, the label of liberal is much easier for me to claim and share with the world than is the label of Mormon.  I have many dear friends who have been hurt deeply by Mormons and Mormon culture.  (Please note that I am referring specifically to people and practices, which by their nature will be flawed.  The true gospel is not.)  Claiming the label of Mormon is also difficult for me because it is a culture in which I do not feel like I belong. Because so much of what I think, feel, and do varies from "normal," "orthodox," or even "conservative" Mormonism, I am not sure that I have the right to claim this label.  But since I'm still connected to the church, and my experiences with the church have shaped my life, for the purpose of this discussion, I am going to claim it.

Fourth, the more I thought about what liberal means to me, the more I realized that many of my conservative Mormon friends would probably feel that those core beliefs are theirs as well.  There is more that connects us than separates us, and we have to find that, lock in to it, and let that be the beauty that pulls us together, that creates a space where we live in unity and with compassion.

Finally, as upset as I was by Sis. Hilton's post, it opened the door for some magnificent conversations.
You can find wonderful responses to Sis. Hilton's article here, here, here, and here.  Please take the time to read them all.  They will give you much more context of this issue than you will find in my own comments here.

As I thought about how to best express my views on this topic, the idea came to me that maybe I'm not a liberal Mormon.  Maybe I'm a Star Trek Mormon.

There are always possibilities.  

One of the things that Mormons believe distinguished their church from others is the idea of continuing revelation.  In fact, the 9th Article of Faith states,

We believe all that God has revealed, all that He does now reveal, and we believe that He will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the Kingdom of God.

We don't know it all yet.  What we know now are the things that have been revealed based on the people's questions, and the ability to hear and implement the the answers.  I don't think that all revelation comes as an instant directive from God unrelated to the needs and wants of those it affects.  I believe that most revelation comes when we struggle with a concept, when we have questions.  It comes when we share those questions and feeling with the people that can make a difference and ask them to inquire as well.  And then, the vessel or vessels must be prepared to receive that information.  I think that we all (including the Quorum of the 12 and the First Presidency) receive revelation through the filter of our own life experiences and culture.  Unless and until our desire to know is greater than our desire to stay with what we have always done and always believed, we will not be completely open to the full message that God is trying to give us.  

I believe that God will yet reveal many things relating to 

• Women's roles and opportunities to serve within the church.  
• Who our Heavenly Mother is and why we have no contact with her.  
• The role of women in the next life.  
• How our homosexual brothers and sisters, and our single brothers and sisters fit into the plan of salvation (which right now only acknowledges the value of heterosexual couples.)  

I believe that very little doctrine is set in stone.  Mormon doctrine is fluid. The book "Mormon Doctine" by Bruce R. McConkie was once thought to be the be all and end all of discussions on doctrine, and now the church says that these are the opinions of one man.  While including many good things, it also includes things that the church as a whole no longer believes.  This article released by the church lays out the position fairly clearly.

By embracing Spock's logic of possibilities, I can live with the things that bother me, while still asking for more information about them.

The core of my liberal beliefs is that every person is a child of Heavenly Parents, and has divine potential.  I cannot and will not choose my friends or choose who I will love and serve by going through a check list of commandments, guidelines, and policies to see if they meet the basic minimum requirements.  I cannot condemn what I do not understand (and if I'm condemning it at all, then maybe I need to look a little deeper.)

In Star Trek II:  The Wrath of Khan, as Kirk speaks at Spock's funeral, he says probably the most profound and loving words possible.

Of all the souls I have encountered in my travels, his was the most...Human.

I can't think of better words that I would like to have expressed at my own funeral.  I was flawed.  I felt things deeply.  But I loved enough to put it all on the line for the people I cared about and strangers I maybe hadn't even met.  That's all.  And that is what being a Liberal Mormon means to me.

Being a Liberal Mormon means acting in a way that I can say in all honesty,

I have been and always shall be your friend.  

So that's it from the Star Trek Mormon for today.

Live long and prosper.