Friday, January 25, 2013

Making a difference

Sometimes you feel like you are just banging your head against the wall, accomplishing nothing, but causing more pain and frustration for yourself. Sometimes it's church. Sometimes it's work. Sometimes it's relationships. Sometimes it's the world.

But then there are those little moments that give us hope. A thank you when you least expect it. Words that give you insights, spoken by someone that doesn't even know what you are experiencing. A small success after a long battle.

Today, I found two reminders that our voices can make a difference.  First, this news from a group of women who would not stop asking for what they needed.

Then I read this beautiful post by a woman who was reminded of why she does what she does.

Who you are and what you do makes a difference!

 

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Fibro fog and other frustrations

Life with fibromyalgia.  Basically, there are 4 types of days that I have as I live with this condition.

1.  Days when both my body and brain refuse to work correctly.  I'm tired, I hurt, and I can't think clearly.  I know I'm in trouble when I can't even focus enough to read a book.  Teaching is a battle.  I can do it, but it takes so much energy to stay focused through the fog that I just come home and crash.
2.  Days when my body wants to work, but my brain doesn't.
3.  Days when my brain is on fire, but my body can't keep up with all the brain wants to do.
4.  Those oh so rare days when my brain and my body both function well.

Sometimes I cycle through these and sometimes they just occur in any random order.  For more than a week, I've been struggling with both mind and body.  But then I gave myself 12 hours of sleep on Friday night, and by Sunday morning (actually really late Saturday night), my body wanted to work.  I actually accomplished more around the house than I have in a long time.  Now my brain is trying to wake up too.  There are glimpses of clarity.  Is it too much to hope that I'm moving into one of those times when I can think and do the things I want to?

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

13 Baby Steps for 2013

If you were in my house today, you could go into my kitchen and see New Year's Resolutions posted on my fridge.  I put them there so I could remember them and focus on them.  Sadly, it's the list from 2010.  The good news is that I am making progress on those goals.  I'm just moving very slowly.  I'm leaving it up for this year too because I think that I need reminders of many of those same things.  You can see the list here.  

This year is all about baby steps--setting small goals that move me towards where I want to be, and being happy with those baby steps.  That's not easy.  I'm smart, talented, determined, and impatient.  I want to be good right now.  But years of living with fibromyalgia have taught me that I don't really get to decide what I can do each day.  Sometimes my body decides for me and it is all I can do to go to work and go to a drive-through window to get something for dinner.  

So since I'm continuing my 2010 resolutions, instead of new resolutions, I have 13 Baby Steps that I will take this year.  Ideally these would be daily things, but part of working with baby steps is understanding that they may not be steady and consistent, but they are moving, and that it what is important.  The amount of time spent on these doesn't matter either.  

1.  Do one thing each day towards keeping the house cleaner.  This can be as small as putting my dishes in the dishwasher.  
2.  Check the mail more often.  
3.  Smile at someone for no reason at least once a day.  
4.  Read.
5.  Sing.  
6.  Listen.  
7.  Play.  
8.  Write.  
9.  Meditate.  
10.  Breathe.  With intent.  
11.  Move.  
12.  Connect.  
13.  Feel joy.  

Simple.  Small.  Purposeful.  I may not accomplish anything grand this year, but I hope to spend more time in self-care, more time nurturing the things that bring peace to my life, and more time sharing that with others.  

By the way, 13 is my lucky number so you can expect to see lots of 13 themed posts this year.